Lesson 5: Always be Looking

April 25, 2008

Before I married my beautiful wife, I was a student of flirtation. It sounds ridiculous to put it that way, but my interest in human interaction and the opposite sex had an academic air about it, even when I was very young.

When my friends, who were invariably goofy and shy, asked for dating advice, I would ask them all the same thing:

If you like this person, what is the worst possible outcome of talking to her?

The simple answer is that the worst possible outcome is that she won’t be interested and won’t want to talk. Basically, you won’t interact and you won’t date. That’s good news, because that’s exactly what would happen if you never talk to her in the first place. Moral of the story: if you don’t talk to her, you are dooming yourself to the worst possible scenario.

Interviews are like a First Date

Interviews are like First Dates

My advice to those wanting to get ahead, is to always be looking for opportunities. I didn’t provide a whole lot of detail about how I came across the previous opportunity I mentioned in the Aiming High lesson.

I had been employed for about a year at a steady job where they were very happy with my performance. Throughout that time, I had been calling, E-mailing, interviewing, and searching for a new job. Why? Getting a good job is like finding a good date.

The most successful people in dating are those who ask the most people out on a date. They are shot down as much as anyone else, but they win by sheer volume. If 9 out of 10 women turn you down, and you ask one woman a month out on a date, you’re looking at about 1 date a year. The chances of that person fulfilling you as a person are slim. If you ask 10 women a week, you’ve dated over 50 women. It’s a numbers game; I’m not talking about being a slut, I’m talking about casual dating. You get to meet people, you stay sharp, so that when that really special person does come along, you were there waiting, prepared for it to happen.

When you’re looking for a job that’s really going to sweep you off your feet, the likelihood of that job being available to you at the very moment you happen to be looking is extremely low. But if you’re constantly looking, constantly staying sharp, then you’ll be prepared when the right one does come along.

Next up, I’ll tell you how to recognize when you’ve discovered a winner.

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One Response to “Lesson 5: Always be Looking”


  1. […] Articles Lesson 0: MotivationLesson 5: Always be LookingLesson 1: Undocumented CredentialsThe Death Bed TestLesson 2: People Matter « Lesson 5: […]


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